Friday, October 22, 2010

Fill in Friday #18

Sorry for the double post today ... here are my answers for Wife of a Sailor's Fill in Friday questions :)

Are you a night owl or an early bird?
LOL can I say both?! Being a Momma to a newborn kinda makes both out of you! But I am normally an early bird. I love sleep and am usually in bed by 10 and can pop right up with the rising sun most days.

What makes you jealous?
I get jealous of people that get married, buy a house, have kids, see them grow up, see them get married, and see their babies have babies all in the same house! Growing up I moved around so much that I was always jealous of kids that grew up and staid in the same house their whole lives. Now don't get me wrong, I am greatful for it, because I can adapt to anything now, but it's just one of the things that makes me a little jealous.

Have you started Christmas/holiday shopping yet? When will you finish? (There’s only 63 days left!)
Have I started shopping? No. Do I have list and ideas for everyone on what I will be getting them. Yes. I am a planner when it comes to big holidays like this :) Plus it gives me an idea of how much we will be spending so I can save a little each check. But I usually don't start shopping until Black Friday!

What would you have a personal chef make you tonight?
Can I just have one come and make me a whole bunch of sweets? I want a banana cake, creme brulee, cupcakes with all kinds of flavors, lemon bars ... I could totally keep going but I am making myself really hungry lol

Where was your first kiss?
OMGsh I remember my first kiss to a T. I was 8 living in Florida on Eglin AFB. I was spending the night with a friend named Bethany and we decided to sneak out and go hang out with my crush Robert L. We went to his house and jumped on his trampoline and then we were going to leave he grabbed me and kissed me. Now just as he did this a car drove by and to me it looked like a flash went off in the car, so I (being young) freaked out and swore that someone took a picture, I was going to end up in the news paper, my Dad was going to see it and I was going to get in so much trouble. Of course that didn't happen and I am even friends with Robert still lol

Getting it Off My Chest

| *Side note: I really hope that no one takes this the wrong way ... I just need to get it off my chest and this blog is my outlet* |

I am lonely. Have been for a very very very long time. I miss having good friends to do stuff with. I miss having my family latterly right down the road. And not saying that I don't have friends here, just not like I have had. And I know part of it is my fault. I don't participate in a lot of the events that going on around here with the local Mommies and wives, but I am having a very hard time connecting with people here. The one person that I had an awesome connection with had to leave (thank you military for that one) and since then I can feel myself slipping into depression.

Then my best friend came to visit and it was so amazing to have her here with me again and do all the things we used to do when we lived two blocks away -- and then she had to go back home, across the country and it was hard. Harder then I thought it was going to be. I miss her more then words could even say. I want to go back to live a year and a half ago (but have Little Man there with us). I miss Florida. I miss my life in Florida. I hate that I feel this way but I do.

I just want to find someone that will drop by out of nowhere b.c they know I need adult interaction, I want to get invited out to do things again, I want to be able to have girl talks and talk about how awful our husbands can be but then again how awesome they are... I know I will never have a connection like I do with my best friend but I really hate that I feel like I have no one. It has made me cry entirely too much and some days I sit here and that is all I think about.

I hate that I feel this way, and like I said, I know part of it is my fault. I want to start getting a group of the girls here that I do know together for a girls night at least once a month. Even if it's just to go out and get coffee. I just need someone to talk to and gossip with. I am a VERY social person. I am and can be a good friend :) I just need to put myself out there more and make friends. I am thankful for the people that I do know here and what they have done for me. I really hope this doesn't upset anyone, like I said I just needed to get it off my chest...

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Breaks My Heart...

So I am sure many of you (if not everyone) has heard about the recent spike in teen suicides due to bullying because of people being different. Well I also know that MANY of these suicides were done by the gay youth. I am sickened by all of this and hate that it is happening. It seriously breaks my heart every time I hear about another young person taking their life because they felt like there was/is no other way to make it stop.

Another reason this hits me SO hard is because my brother is one of those that are young and gay in the world and is effected by immature, under educated people, bullies out there in the world. He has had SO many people say and do thing to him that have hurt him. Thank God he is strong enough to know that this people are idiots and has not felt like taking his life was the only way out. I have been there personally when people have verbally attacked him and the rage that I feel must only be 25% of what he feels when people lash out at him.

Tonight he and his boyfriend where minding their own business shopping at Target when they were called out and verbal attacked. Here is his story that he shared with me via facebook:

"L and I were in the Halloween/Christmas area of Target, which is in the back right hand corner, and these three guys were walking away from us towards the food section and were saying shit like "Can you even be that gay?" and making comments like "Want to see my nipple." and lifting up his shirt.

So we ignored them although I kept my eye on them until they were out of sight, so we just make a comment to each other about how we are in Orlando and in the 'college town' part of Orlando and that their redneck-ness is more out of place.

Then we see the same guys coming from the bike/toy are and I said it was time to go and so we started walking down towards the electronics department and they were by the women's clothes and one of the guys comes towards us and yells "FAGS" and I just happen to be by an employee of Target.

I turned around and said loudly that I needed security called on those guys and that what they were doing was a hate crime and he made fun of me and went the other direction, we went to check out and the employee talked to the security. We left with my car keys in between my fingers because that is how unsafe these guys made me feel.

I start to back out and the security guard is running towards the car and so I pull back in to the spot and he apologizes for the guys and makes sure we are okay and while we are talking to him the guys start walking towards my car and waving and laughing.

When I pulled out to drive away they stood in the middle of the road and spit on my car so as soon, and I mean within millimeters of them, I pulled out... rather quickly.

When we got home I called Target and talked to the manager to make sure he knew that the security guard and the other employee did a great job he told me that there were other incidents inside the store that the guys were involved in and that they had attacked someone in the parking lot.

Needless to say L and I will be carrying at the very least pepper spray in the car from now on. If the security guard hadn't been outside with us I'm sure these assholes would have acted out more."

If you don't believe this is happening or are shunning your eyes to what is going on out there then reading that story hopefully gave you a HUGE reality check. This IS happening and we need to do something about it. I don't care if you don't "AGREE" with their lifestyle. They are just trying to live their life and DO NOT deserve what is going on. For those of you that are turning your heads to this because of your beliefs, if this was happening to lets say the mentally handicaps in the world would you still be turning your heads, or would you stand up and fight with them?

You have to remember the gays in the world are just people like us, they love, the hate, the cry, the laugh, the live & they die. Let's not see their life cut short by our hateful actions and words.

Friday, October 15, 2010


So I may be bias when I say that I really think that I make the cutest babies ever! I think Hunk and I's combination is really perfect! Little Miss has those big brown eyes, long golden brown hair, beautiful little smile & great personality! Little Man is going to be Mr Tall Dark and Handsome with his dark hair and big blue eyes. And trust me I tell them every day just how beautiful and handsome they are ...

With that being said, I think I have created monsters!

It started when Little Miss was about three months old ... What is "it" you might ask ... Oh FLIRTING! You see, she would see a boy anywhere in a room that she wanted attention from and she would figure out a way to get it. It started out with coy little yells across a room, and when the boy would finally look to see who the screaming child was, she would give him the BIGGES smile and BOOM he was wrapped and instantly was her's. The she learned how to say "Boy" and would call from across the room "BOY!!!...BOY!!!...BOY!!!..." and do this until she once again got the attention she wanted and then batted her big beautiful eyes and gave them that beautiful smile and once again BAM! Now that she is older, she has MASTED this flirting. Let's use one of my husbands friend's as a good example ... We shall call him J.Arbo (for those of you that know us personally you know who I am referring to). You see when Little Miss first set her sights on this boy she had to have him. I will never forget the day he walked in and she proceeded to do a little walk around him, check him out from toe, and then say in the CUTEST voice ever "Heeeeey" and I swear to you I am not lying. And now every time he is over her, she tries to keep his attention on her almost the entire time, she has even asked him to take a bath with her! LOL.

And now Little Man, you see I thought things would be different with him ... But no! Thursday I had surgery to remove my gallbladder and him and the Mr stayed with me. It was a quick one, in at 7am and then home by 10am. And after I was done with the surgery, in the recovery room they came back to sit with me. Well let me tell you... My little 7 WEEK OLD decided to flirt with EVERY nurse that came up and talked to him!! He would give them his cute little smile and then just let out the sweetest little coo!! My baby boy was flirting with women ...

What have I done?!? I just know that these two are going to give us a world of trouble when they are older!! And that is why I have decided to lock them up and trow away the keys :)

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Fill in Friday #17 (On Thrus.)

Yes I am filling it out a day early b.c ... well I just had my gallbladder removed and I am pretty drugged up, so I might as well fill it out now when I have the energy to do it and I am not in horrible pain and can't ... here are my answers for Wife of a Sailor's Fill in Friday questions :)

1. What are some things on your bucket list?
Travel, get my dream tattoo, see a Saint's football game in the Super Dome, go on a cruse with my best friend ... There are more, but I can't think right now lol

2. How long have you been a MilSpouse and where have you been stationed so far?
We have been together 4 years (married going on 4 years in Jan.) and we have been stationed at Hulbert Field, FL (lived on Eglin AFB) and here (Robins AFB) and we will most likely be here the rest of this time in :)

3. What is a list of songs that sums up your life so far?
Oh goodness... "Momma's Song" by Carrie Underwood, "Honky Tonk, Buh Donk a Donk", "Who I Am"

4. What is your favorite kind of pizza?
Hamburger, bacon & mushroom -- yuuuuuuum!

5. What are three good things in your life right now?
1. My Husband
2. My Kids
3. My Friends

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Need Your Opinion!

I will be ordering my new business cards soon and I want some opinions on it before I pay the money for it ... (The top image is for the front and the bottom image is for the back) **Please click on the image to see it bigger!

What do you think? Does it stand out enough? If you were seeing it sitting somewhere would you pick it up? I need HONEST opinions so please don't hold back!

Finally Caught It...

Little Man has been smiling for a good two weeks now and I have been trying to capture it since day one, but every time I go to take a picture he sees my big bulky camera and ends up just staring at it and stops smiling.

Well last night Hunk was sitting on the floor with him and Little Man was smiling SO much ... So I went and grabbed my camera and stood back far enough that he couldn't see me and finally got a picture of him smiling! And here it is:

Is that not the cutest thing you have ever seen?!?! It for real melts my heart every time he gives me that HUGE toothless smile. I honestly do not remember Little Miss smiling this early or as much as he does. He is such a happy baby :) I love that he smiles so much.

On another note ... I am going into surgery at 615am tomorrow morning to FINALLY get this gallbladder taken out of me! I am so ready for it to be GONE and not cause me any more pain. I went into the ER Sunday night which was an experience let me tell you. After dinner I all of a sudden had a HORRIBLE pain in my stomach. It was so bad that I latterly fell to the floor in pain. The Mr finally convinced me to go to the ER around 9pm. I go there and did not get out until 330am!!! I found out after many blood tests and a CT scan that I had a baseball sized cysts rupture :( It was so not fun at all. And I have been in so much pain from it since then. They gave me some good pain meds though that make me VERY loopy and VERY tired, so I am thankful that Hunk is on leave this week!

I am just so ready to be back to "normal" and not be in pain any more. I am so over this year lol. I am ready to have my old self back. I know that once my gallbladder is gone things will start looking up! At least that's what I keep telling myself!

Friday, October 8, 2010

Fill in Friday #16

I know I have missed the past two :( Life has been kiiiiiinda busy since Little Man came into our lives, I am back and I am going to try to keep up again :) LOL ... anyways, here are my answers for Wife of a Sailor's Fill in Friday questions :)

1. What is the longest road trip you’ve ever taken?
That would be when we moved from Texas to Ohio! OMG I will never forget how long and awful that trip was ... not to mention POINTLESS! We only lived in Texas for two weeks before we decided to move back to Ohio, it was like a vacation ... A HORRIBLE, hot, pointless vacation! (*okay rant over sorry about that lol*)

2. Do you collect anything? Tell us a bit about it.
I don't really collect anything ... Wait I take that back, I collect moments in time :) You see when I am not being a Mommy/Housewife I actually own a photography business :) and you know what I looove collecting these moment for my clients and sharing them with the world! (ps if you would like to check out my collection you can see it here: Brooke Ashley Photography)

3. What is your favorite part about being an adult?
Having kids! I love my babies so so much, but I would not of wanted them any earlier in life then I did. I had Little Miss a month before I turned 22 and trust me I had partied enough and was ready to settle down! She forced me to "grow-up" and I am very thankful for that :)

4. What song brings a tear to your eye?
Right now ... "If He's Anything Like Me" - Brad Paisley. It's such a sweet song to a son from a father and it just makes me think of Hunk and Little man<3

5. Describe your first plane ride (how old you were, where you were heading, etc).
I was in the 5th grade and our class went on a school trip from Ohio to Washington, DC for a week. I honestly don't remember anything about the plane ride at all! I just know that we flew and that was my first plane ride ... I wish I could remember more about it lol

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Life with Two Kids

Oh man ... Life went from zero to breaking the sound barrier so fast I didn't have time to blink ... I cannot believe that it has been six weeks since we brought little man into this crazy world. I am not going to lie, I thought that it wouldn't be much different going from one kid to two. Boy was I wrong. I feel like I haven't seen the world outside this house in forever! Now do not get me wrong, Little Man is a WONDERFUL baby, I really feel blessed. He hasn't really had a ton of "bad" days ... a lot less then his sister had. I am just missing sleep and my adult friends a lot right now. I feel like my house is ALWAYS a mess and I can never keep up, I look at it and think "Oh my, if someone just stopped by right now I would be SO embarrassed of this place." I know that things will get better, he will get older and won't mind not being held and I will be able to get things done. But right now... My world is upside down.

Little Miss ... oh Little Miss. She was doing SO good when Little Man first came home, now ... jealously has set in and she is lashing out SO bad. I feel bad b.c I know she is used to getting ALL my attention. At the drop of a hat she could get what she wanted. And now, I feel like I have hardly any time for her. I feel like I took away her childhood almost at times. But I know she is just in a transitional stage and she will get better :) She really is a BIG help for me (89% of the time), if I need something for Little Man and I know she can get to it I know that I can ask and she will get it (again 89% of the time) I call her my mini momma. She really does love her baby brother. She loves to kiss on him and talk to him. He loves her too, when she talks to him he always get the BIGGEST toothless grin on his face and will "coo" at her. It's the kind of thing that melts your heart. She is really into her pretend stage and will sit and make up stories and songs all day long. I crack up at some of the things she comes up with. (I wish I could think of one off the top of my head right now, but lack of sleep has my brain feeling like mush right now) I am so thankful for Hunk. He has been SUCH a HUGE help with her. Every day when he comes him, he takes over with her without me even asking. He has been taking her outside every evening this week since it has been SO nice out! Right now he is trying to teach her hop-scotch and it's SO cute the way she "hops" (I really need to get a video of it) She loves her Daddy and looks forward to when he comes home. The second he walks out the door she turns to me and says "I miss Daddy" lol. She has been testing the waters a lot lately but then she will do something out of the blue (like make a silly face) and it will just make my day.

Little Man is growing like a weed. He is starting to fill out and get little rolls all over his body. He is such a little cutie :) Every morning when he wakes up I will look down in his bassinet and he gives me the BIGGEST smile and sweet baby talk like he is happy to see me. He knows who his Momma is that is for sure. I can already see him being a BIG Momma's boy (aren't they all) which doesn't upset me in the least bit. When he gives me those sweet smiles and coos it makes me feel like I am doing something right in the world :) He is becoming a lot more alert now too! He interacts with me so much. I make faces and he watches what I am doing, sometimes trying to mimic other times smiling and will be on the verge of laughing. He loves when I puff my cheeks out and when I move my eyebrows up and down. He loves to watch the ceiling fan spin. I will put it on the lowest setting and he will just stair at it for the longest time, then he realizes he is laying on the floor and freaks out lol. During the day the ONLY place he sleeps is in his swing. I try to lay him down in his play pen and he wants NOTHING to do with it. If he is asleep he wakes RIGHT up and screams bloody murder till I pick him up. He is still eating every two hours, and let me tell you I am looking forward to when we break that routine! He is such a handsome little boy too... He has some of the same features as Little Miss, but I honestly think they look nothing alike. He has blue eyes, light hair and lighter skin then Little Miss did when she was his age. I am so intrigued to know what he is going to look like when he is her age. I can remember with Little Miss doing the "I can't wait for her to ..." game and with him, I am in no rush for him to grow up. I wish he could stay little forever. It makes me emotional to even think that he is already six weeks old. Time flys by entirely too fast and sometimes I wish I could just pause it and take in that moment with him. He is my last baby I plan on having (for now I say that) so I want to savor it and I really hate that time is going this fast. I know I am going to miss having a baby in the house again at some point but I really feel as though two is enough lol.

As for me (and sorry there are no pictures of me lol) I am doing as well as I can be with little to no sleep :) I go for my 6 week check up this coming Thurs. and I am getting on an IUD that lasts 10 years!! It's going to be kind of crazy to think that I don't have to worry about BC for TEN years, but nice that I don't have to worry about it at the same time lol. I get my gallbladder out next Thurs. (THANK GOODNESS). I am so ready to be back to all healed up and back to "normal" so that I can officially start Operation: Get Pre-Babies Body Back :) I am sick of looking the way I do ... I have NEVER been this heavy and I really really really hate myself right now. I want to be back to 130 (140 at the most) and I know I can do it, I just have to put my mind to it :) This weekend I am going to the local fair that is in town and I am planning on looking at it as my last weekend to eat whatever I want so I plan on enjoying myself, b.c once this gallbladder is out I am changing my diet COMPLETELY and cutting a lot out of what I normally eat. It is time for a change and the time is now! I will be doing a weekly weigh in on myself and keeping track of how much I am losing. I think if I see it coming off that it will keep my motivation up to keep at it :)

So that's the FULL update on us :) Sorry it's so lenghtly, I feel like I have been so bad at blogging, but trust me it's a lol harder to find time to sit in front of a computer right now ... And as I type that Jayce is waking up and wanting to be fed ... So it's off I go, back to reality :)

Monday, October 4, 2010

Counting my Blessings

Let me just tell you ... since two Mondays ago I have sat down to write this blog many many maaaaaannnnny times and every time I do my stomach goes into knots instantly (like it is now). You see this is something hard for me to post but then it's something good at the same time ...

I learn something about myself on Sept. 24th ... I learned that I am prone to getting skin cancer ... And how do I know this you might ask ... Well you see about two years ago I started getting a small mold on the top of my head, right inside my hair line. I never thought anything of it, plus to me it was an easy way of knowing where to part my hair daily. But it started to grow, and it grew FAST and ugly. It wasn't until my Mom said something about it about a year ago that I really thought that it might be something to worry about. But I put it off. I didn't want to know it could be something bad. And by the looks of it, I knew it could be something bad.

Well I finally got the nerves to finally get it looked at. I went to a dermatologist on Sept. 8th, he took one look at it and said "That needs to come out. But we are going to have to surgically remove it." So I came back a week later on Sept. 15th and had it cut off my head. Then I had to wait two weeks to find out the results ... It was the most nerve racking two weeks of my life!!

I went in on the morning of the 24th to have the stitches removed and to find out what exactly it was, if anything.

The doctor came in and told me that I should consider myself lucky ... It was an EARLY stage of skin cancer -- Stage I: Cancerous cells are present. Cancerous lesion is less than 2 millimeters in thickness. THANK YOU JESUS. I mean yes it sucks that I had an early stage of it, but it's gone and I don't have to worry about it any more.

But now I know that I HAVE to start being more careful! I can't not take care of my skin any more. Being a fair skinned redhead means I can get skin cancer a lot easier then I thought and trust me I am counting my blessings and plan on taking more caution to the sun now :)

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